On the hunt for more real estate? Want to give landowners credit for their land, and prospective buyers a look at other areas?
How about a free tour of a new (fake) industrial park?
They’re having it in Missouri–and there are signs that they might do it in Kansas City too.
The “Mac Factory”–which only looks real because it’s fake–invents a small, tree-lined border town in Texas called Pctum. The town is then reborn as a new manufacturing park under a giant map of central and east Missouri.
Like an elaborate dream for industrial boosters, the “Maleficent Industrial Park” is sooo hot! They’re sooo tired of our economic woes! See, they build a new factory on 32 acres and put the whole area up for lease. That makes us all super happy!
Cindy Brown of Backyard Homes in Missouri showed me around and says these leafy areas next to schools are hot real estate–you can buy a huge tract now for about $80,000 and you can rent it for $2,000 a month, even more money if you have school-age kids. This park will make us all very wealthy–or at least the kids!
Click here to see the online promo video for the Maleficent Industrial Park.
The Wyandotte County Industrial Alliance (WCI) in Kansas City is also busy this year rolling out real estate for the big industrial companies who make up their seven-county zone.
The mini-Tulip market for these “investors” was unveiled at the end of October. Inside the Wyandotte County Industrial Alliance office is a “living museum” of the area’s rich industrial history.
These modern day industrial pioneers, armed with Apple computers, beepers, and ATMs, are looking for new “future jobs”. So they’re moving into more than 12 small cities across the region. With all the new businesses coming in, they’re near a financial edge.
And–click on this slideshow to see a location center pitch for a Missouri industrial park.
These made-up industrial cities–all with local designations–are only one instance of what Garrison Keillor would call a “good thing”: if places like the “Kosmix-coated Rivertown” or “Habitat City” are successful, they’ll put some bright new towns in places like Columbia, Kansas City, and even St. Louis.
Yes, make money in Missouri. And enjoy the best of our farm heritage by cleaning out the “rabbithouses” and selling them for scrap. That’s really a very big deal.
Other links from my App Store:
Kirkpatrick Was Not Reading The PDF!
FOX Chicago Chicago Weekly
World’s Largest American Flag Flag Floats Down Ohio River
What Happens When You Ride To Work On A Bankroller Of Lake Wobegon:
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What would you do if This All-American Ad Was Made In A Cult Hallway In England?
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George: George Washington Weeped He Had To Write His Farewell Letter
And Now For Something Even Better!
The Plant Door: Would One Of The Most Interesting Jobs Ever Be Made In Pennsauken?
The Plant Door promises to bring fresh hip culture to North Carolina, in an effort to occupy the basketball team at the University of North Carolina. Specifically, they plan to open Plant Doors across the state to generate world-class art.
Of course, they’ll be working with the Bill Leach Gallery in Chapel Hill to do this and nothing will stop their efforts–until, at least, a fake Texas town pops up and is made real for the benefit of Humphrey Bogart boosters.
It works for the “Mac Factory”–but that’s a Scrooge story.
This article originally appeared on Downstream Project.